when does life begin?

I have a complicated view on abortion.
My parents actually went to have my brother aborted but there was a line so they went to get lunch during which my dad talked my mom into marrying him. I heard this story for the first time while eating at the bar they choose for that lunch while my parents were visiting me at college. My brother never knew until then as well.
Three of my cousins were adopted. My aunt couldn't have kids. Two of my cousins aren't the brightest but they all have college degrees.
Before I was married, I was fully intent on marrying my wife. There was a moment when she thought she was possibly pregnant though she was on a form of birth control. I didn't think she was pregnant, but the idea was there. She wasn't ready for a child, so I would have supported her decision. Obviously she wasn't pregnant, but rather she felt weird due to the birth control affecting her. Regardless, I was willing to turn a blind eye to my feelings of pro-life.
I've been reading a lot of angst about the heart-beat bills passed in Ohio and such. Everyone seems fixated on an 11 year old in Ohio who was "raped" by a 26 year old. I use the quotes because it seems she willfully ran away to be with the guy. Not to take away from her being raped but to put context that abortion my not have been her first inclination...
My older daughter turned 11 today. If I had found out she was with a 26 year old... I would be inclined to end his heart-beat. Regardless, back when she was a heart-beat in her mom's belly, ultrasounds were sketchy and suggested she may have Down's. We met with a genetic counselor and he tried to scare us. We would have loved our daughter regardless, so we shrugged at their suggesting to terminating her heart beat.
The argument in favor of abortion is the reproductive rights of a woman are being infringed upon.
Not sure how many abortions are of planned pregnancies, but there's surely a reason for the pregnancy occurring in the first place.  I imagine alcohol may be to blame for a good number of unplanned pregnancies. Given that an intoxicated person may lack the ability to give consent, so technically, those pregnancies would be due to rape, right? Wasn't rape almost always an exception in the past? The problem then lies in that fact that the guy probably does not consider himself a rapist and the woman probably blames herself for being drunk.  The woman shouldn't be forced to have a guy's baby just because he didn't use protection, nor should she need his permission to abort his unwanted seed. Unless there's a notarized letter stating the unprotected sexual encounter was consensual, then the DNA from the aborted fetus should be ample evidence of a rape. The guy could be guilty of rape and murder thus locked up indefinitely to never cause another unplanned pregnancy again.
The threat of being charged with rape and murder should deter a guy from suggesting the pull-out method in lieu of a trusty condom.
If a woman is worried she'd be forced to charge he BF with rape... pregnency testing could be made free, and done before a heart-beat is detected.

I've never tried the "pull-out" method, I am a Trojan Man. I have yet to have an unplanned pregnancy thanks to Trojan. I think back to when we used the other means of birth control, and I find myself with more peace of mind.